—Listen, Aaron. I'm not trying to question your sense of fashion. But this new look is throwing me.
—You don't dig my new Japanese shirt pants? They're all the rage in Belize right now.
—No, no. Those are pretty dope.
—So it's my rainbow suspender hat, is it? This is a one-of-a-kind Helmut Auterlitz that shipped all the way from Dusseldorf. I could name at least a dozen Norwegian models who would knife me for this gem.
—That's a hat? I though you were just working on your balance. Look, it's those sunglasses. Why are you wearing two pairs at a time?
—What, these? It's irony, man. I'm trying to say that my future's future is so bright, I gotta wear shades and shades.
—Why is that ironic?
—Oh, you know. I just lost my job for wearing a chainmail tuxedo to the office and my girlfriend kicked me out for cutting off ever right sleeve in her closet.
—That's pretty rough stuff. But if you just lost your job, how did you afford two new pairs of shades?
—Easy. OnSale's running this special deal where you can get a $40 voucher to Vibewear.com for just $20. Since all their sunnies are around $20, I scored two for the price of one.
—Seriously? They look like my legit Wayfarers except I dropped a hundo on those at the mall.
—Bonehead move, man.
—Yeah, I hear you. So what are you gonna do now that you're out of work and out of love?
—I think it's time I finally tried starting my own clothing line. I've been working on some ideas. Imagine an entire summer collection inspired by Bjork's swan dress and a slaughterhouse. What do you think?
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